Nobody needs to stay friends with someone who is full of drama, negativity, and is toxic.
The problem comes when you don’t know how to get rid of a toxic friend. There are things that you can do to help yourself deal with toxic friends.
When you are ready to end the friendship, you will be able to get rid of toxic people successfully.
Toxic people have a way of hanging on to you and coming back into your life even when you think they’re gone. They can also guilt you into changing your mind and not leaving them.
Toxic people come in the form of acquaintances, friends, family members, and even romantic partners.
First, you must open your eyes and be able to see the signs of a toxic person.
Only then will you know how to deal with the toxic people in your life. You will be able to move on from that relationship and remain at peace with your decision.
What Are The Signs Of A Toxic Person?
Toxic people aren’t people who annoy you or irritate you. Toxic people are people who use manipulation and constantly put you down. Some of the ways they do this are:
- Deny responsibilities for their actions
- Play “the victim.”
- Lie and be deceptive
- Always be in the “right,” they are never in the wrong
- Have little or no regard for the boundaries of others
- Be controlling of others
- Take advantage of others
- Frequently cause you to stress
- Remind you of your failures or times when you were wrong
Friends or people in general who use these tactics have no regard for your feelings unless it makes them feel better about themselves.
If you start to notice these signs, it might be time for you to let go of that toxic person.
Not every toxic person will show all of these signs, but most people will exhibit many of them over time.
Speaking of time, it may take you some time to recognize these signs in the people who you are closest with.
Toxic people can be very good at manipulating and deceiving you. If your toxic relationship turns abusive, you may need to ask for help. You should never stay in an abusive situation.
If you are not in an abusive situation but are in some type of toxic relationship, you need to find ways to deal with it.
If you do not want to rid the toxic person from your life, check out the following ways to deal with a toxic friendship.
How To Deal With Toxic Friends
One of the first things you should do with a toxic friend is to communicate with them.
Your friend might not know that what they’re doing is hurting you or that they take advantage of you. Your best option for keeping the friendship is to talk about your feelings.
Don’t be agreeable with everything they say. You should feel comfortable enough with your friend that you can tell them “no,” that they are hurting your feelings, or that you feel uncomfortable.
A toxic friend who wants to change may feel like they are in the right. Make sure that you aren’t sugarcoating the situation – for both of your sake.
Once you have discussed the issues with your toxic friend, you will get an idea of whether or not to end the friendship.
Take the time to evaluate the conversation that the two of you had and don’t make a rash decision. If your decision is to leave the toxic friendship, there are ways that you can go about it.
How To Get Rid Of Toxic Friends
When you have made the decision to get rid of a toxic friend, you should cut ties as easily as possible.
If you have the same circle of friends, this may become difficult, but remember, it’s what’s best for you.
Make sure that your other friends have a clear understanding of why you are cutting ties with your toxic friend.
If your circle of friends disagrees with you or urges you to reconsider, take time to see if they are also as toxic.
Sometimes toxic people rely on each other in order to manipulate others. If they are truly your friends, they will understand your position.
Take the time to talk to your friend about your feelings. If you feel that you have a toxic friendship, make a list of why you feel like this person is toxic.
Use this list when you have a conversation about why you can no longer be friends. Do your best to be open to conversation with the other person.
When you are talking about the toxic friendship, don’t place blame on the other person or point fingers. Stay calm, and do your best to not get upset. If the situation escalates, you will want to leave.
If you feel uncomfortable, you may want to bring someone else with you for backup.
Having someone else who understands the situation will help you move on from your friendship.
If you constantly frequent the same places, you may want to find some new hangouts for a little while. Be mindful of how often this person crosses your mind and try to move past the negativity.
Make an effort to “erase” this person from your life. Take them off social media and tell your friends “no” if they make group plans with the other person.
There is no reason for you to constantly see the other person. By not seeing them, you will be able to increase your happiness.
If the person in your life is not a toxic friend, but a toxic romantic relationship or family member, it may be even harder to move on.
How To Get Rid Of A Toxic Relationship
Life is too short to give in to your toxic family members or continue a toxic, romantic relationship.
While you may not be able to cut a family member out of your life, you can choose to get a different partner or a new friend.
Dealing With Toxic Family Members
When you have to deal with toxic family members, there are things that you can do to help yourself. You will also be able to limit the amount of hurt and manipulation that they inflict on you.
Keep conversations light. There is no need for toxic family members to know everything that is going on in your life.
Keeping conversations to a minimum will also reduce the ability for them to build “ammunition.” If you keep your private life private, they will not be able to criticize you, either.
If you feel comfortable enough, talk to this person about their behavior and how it makes you feel. Don’t expect them to change instantly, or ever.
When you communicate what is bothering you with that person, remember to stay calm and don’t blame them. Don’t expect all of you other family members to take your side either.
Other family members may not like that you are pushing back against someone. They may also feel that you are overreacting.
Just remember, they cannot feel your feelings for you. Remember the signs of toxic people and feel confident in your position.
Your toxic family member may be able to move forward in a positive way. This is the best possible outcome. To best protect yourself, you should offer your forgiveness, but don’t feel like you have to forget their actions.
When you forget how they’ve hurt you in the past, it is possible for them to return to their old way.
While family members may always be around, and you may be expected to interact with them, you don’t have to continue a toxic partnership.
Dealing With Toxic Partners
If you feel that you are in a toxic partnership, it may be time to move on. As mentioned earlier, with friends and family members, recognize the signs first.
After that, try to have an open and honest conversation about their behavior and how it makes you feel.
Again, do not expect the other person to change. If your relationship is important to the other person, they may want to change, but may not know how.
Do your best to offer your support and encouragement if they want to move forward.
You should not feel obligated to move forward, even if your partner has apologized. Just like removing a toxic friend, you may find it better for your overall mental health to cut ties and move on.
If you want to give the other person a chance to change, do so, but revisit the signs of a toxic partnership.
Signs of a toxic partnership are much like the signs of a toxic friendship.
Other ways that partners can be difficult are to make you feel bad when interacting with other people. Don’t allow your relationship to make you isolate yourself.
When leaving the relationship, try to end it nicely. As previously mentioned, don’t play the “blame game” and stay calm.
After things have ended, keep your distance from your ex-partner. Take them off of your social accounts and get rid of their number.
The other person may not like that you are moving on, and they may try to get you to come back.
Since you have made up your mind, and are starting to move on, keep reminding yourself of the reasons you ended things. The best thing for you may be to cut them out of your life and not let them back in.
How To Cut Someone Out Of Your Life
There are steps that you can take to cut someone out of your life. When you cut someone out of your life, be prepared for mixed emotions, uncertainty, and possibly regret.
Get a friend who knows what you are going through and is trustworthy to lean on. Your friend will be able to help remind you of your decision when you start to feel emotional or regretful of your decision.
Keep your distance from the individual who you want to cut out of your life. Remove them from your social profiles, do not accept visits or phone calls from them, and try to avoid backsliding.
Backsliding can happen if you don’t have a friend or family member to rely on. It can also happen if you remind yourself of sentimental things about your relationship.
If you are sentimental or emotional, try to remove any objects or pictures that remind you of the individual.
Purge your social media of pictures with the two of you. Get rid of any gifts that you have been given by them. Replace things that you two bought together. These steps can be very empowering if you have been put down for a long time.
When regret and uncertainty pop up, remind yourself that you made the decision to cut them out of your life for your well being.
No one should be forced to stay in a manipulative, one-sided, or stressful relationship. Remind yourself what life was like prior to the relationship.